Sarah's Book Is A Stimulus Package For The Comedy Industry

"The book costs $24.99, but it has a $5,000 jacket." --Jimmy Fallon

"Sarah Palin's 400-page memoir is going to be released on November 17th, and it's called 'Going Rogue: An American Life.' And critics say that it starts out okay, it get's really exciting and then confusing, and then the last 100 pages are blank." --Jimmy Fallon


"People in Alaska are looking forward to Sarah Palin's memoir. They're already calling it 'The Book to Nowhere.'" --David Letterman

"They say she finished the book ahead of schedule so they moved the release date up to November 17th. So, turns out she can finish something." --Jimmy Kimmel

"It's a big, huge book. But when you go into the store, you can use that big book to step up so you can reach a better book." --David Letterman

"But the book has got a lot of beautiful color photos that Sarah has taken from her front porch -- beautiful pictures of Russia that she took from her front porch." --David Letterman


David Letterman's Top Ten Sarah Palin Tips For Writing A Book

10. Close curtains so you don't get distracted by Russia.
9. Increase vocabulary -- use words like "slanket."
8. First buy yourself 100-grand worth of writing outfits.
7. Don't write a word until the check clears.
6. Limit yourself to one "you betcha" per chapter.
5. You can never have enough stories about ice fishing or killing things with your bare hands.
4. When in doubt, just type (wink).
3. Don't let writing cut into attending "Fire Letterman" rallies.
2. Have a book translated for sale to European countries like London.
1. I'll try to find ya some tips and I'll bring 'em to ya!

One Year Ago We First Met The Wasilla Hillbillies

It has been a good ride Sarah and we will continue to follow your career as it shifts gears from forward to reverse, to neutral and back again. You've given us a lot of laughs, even tears (from laughing so hard) with your Tweets, Facebook wall and and even your so called "prepared" speeches. One of my favorite sites for mockery is Mock, Paper, Scissors , This from Tengrain there today :

One year ago today, Mooselini was thrust into the national spotlight, thanks to the failing and flailing presidential campaign that Grandpa Walnuts was running. And in some sort of act of desperate daring-do, the old fart unleashed upon an unsuspecting public perhaps the greatest grifter and her clan of hillbillies in modern American history.

Besides the animal-like Todd, we have:

•Track: the alleged meth connection sent to Iraq to head off a criminal charge, and to clean him out, but it’s pretty close to ground zero in the heroin supply chain.
•Bristol: the single mother of Trip, ex-girlfriend of Levi and noted abstinance educator.
•Willow: the mysterious Palin with a vacant Jan-Brady smile. bristol, Bristol, BRISTOL!
•Piper: perhaps the one to keep an eye on, she might snap any moment now that she is the second-place human shield when her brother…
•Trig/Algorythm: who may or may not be Mooselini’s kid, and served as the campaign’s prop and took first place as a human shield away from Piper. Trig is the likable Palin.
•Levi: the handsome but stupid sperm donor and father of…
•Trip: who probably is another likable Palin, because he is really a Johnston.
Sweet Jeebus? Only one year? Really?

Really, I know, it seems time flies when you're having a good time.

More Wisdom From Pancake Head Palin

" BLITZER: Does that mean you want to come up with a new Sarah Palin initiative that you want to release right now.
PALIN: Gah! Nothing specific right now. Sitting here in these chairs that I’m going to be proposing but in working with these governors who again on the front lines are forced to and it’s our privileged obligation to find solutions to the challenges facing our own states every day being held accountable, not being just one of many just casting votes or voting present every once in a while, we don’t get away with that. We have to balance budgets and we’re dealing with multibillion dollar budgets and tens of thousands of employees in our organizations. "

Gah ! ..................Nothing specific here at all...............actually , nothing said either because Princess Sparkle Pony strings together buzz words and generally noble rhetoric. Sadly , it's enough to excite the fundies and the bubbas. They love her down at the four wheel mud bog. They love her down at the Church of Fuck You, I've Got Mine. She has to be the first beauty queen that is against world peace. Everyone please donate to her next campaign, and Huck's and Mittens' and Rooty's because to watch the Republicans tear each other apart for the next few years will be .....well.....sublime.


The Sarah image is done by the artist Dan Lacey. He does others with a pancake on their head and he has Condi Rice with a jockstrap on her head. Isn't the internets great ?